To the Nines
"To perfection." That's what that means - to the nines. Yet, when it comes to birthday's, the nines don't get much credit and in one week, I will be in my last year of being 30-something. I believe that deserves some hype for sure.
>> For my 9th birthday, I had my first costume party that has instilled in me that every birthday celebration should be themed and involve costumes or dressing up in fun ways.
>> 19 catapulted me into adulthood. I left everything and everyone I knew in Cali and moved myself to Texas, got myself an apartment and a pretty cushy job. Scary and exciting all the same.
>> I was a newlywed at 29 and going on a whole new adventure there.
>> That brings us to 39. 30-to perfection. Ok, so I won't go that far. Last year, I shared with y'all my thoughts on being Almost 40 where I mentioned that I wasn't feelin' the usual birthday jazz. Well, I figured out why.
So this is my gift to you my friends, for my 39th birthday I share with you one more lesson I've learned as I am on my journey "to perfection".
Lesson 39: You're Not Missing Out.
Last year I thought I was bored. Bored with what I was doing, reading, studying, people I was surrounding myself with, where I was headed. B-O-R-E-D. My brain was telling me to knock it off and that life was good, my heart was telling me otherwise. What the last few months have taught me is it's not that I was bored with what I had going on, I was fearing that I was missing out on so much more because my current sitch wasn't allowing there to be more.
With my son going in and out of the hospital, I had plenty of time to experience what it means to "miss out" and yet, sitting in his many different hospital rooms I never found myself being bored. Here are a few examples of ways we let the fear of missing out play tricks on us:
1. We stay connected - email, Twitter, Instagram and other social networks so we don't miss something important.
2. We work constantly because if we don't, we might miss out on opportunities that other people will get.
3. We travel because it seems that other people are living these amazing, wonderful lives by traveling all the time.
4. We try and do the most exciting things, in constant search of exciting things, because we miss out on the fun that others are having.
5. We miss what we don't have, miss places and people who we aren't with.
The Middle Child can't fall asleep if she knows that people are still up in the house, doing things. She will literally lay in bed for hours until she could no longer fight the sleep or until the house is finally silent. Why? Why do we fear missing out? We could never do it all. We will always be missing something. So, if we can't help but miss out, what would then be a saner alternative than letting this fear take over? In the famous words of Elsa - let it go. (Unless you've been living under a rock that is Disney-free, you know who Elsa is.)
Let it go and realize you have everything right now. I will say that in this moment, although it's been a little emotionally and even physically crazy in my household in the last few months - in this very moment - I. Am. Happy. The best in life isn't somewhere else, it's right where you are, at this very moment. There isn't anything better than exactly that.
Somewhere along the line between then and now, I noticed where I was, what I'm doing, who I am at this very moment. I noticed who always comes to my side to laugh, play and even cry with. I noticed that I can run until I'm tired and then some. I noticed I'm more grounded, confident and secure in the person God has created me to be. I am grateful because I'm actually not missing out, but have been given.
So raise your virtual glass with me and let us cheer on 39. May the last year of my thirties be full of more love, laughter and great stories. Thank you friends - my homies - for allowing me to share my life with you and I hope you continue to do so. xxo.