Always, Sarah

The Rumor that can Kill Your Mojo

Have you ever heard that life is hard? Well it is.  And being a girl is hard.  And being an entrepreneur is hard.  We all have our own struggles that become this heavy, dark cloud over everything we are trying to accomplish, and it can destroy us at any moment.  It's totally bootsy. And I'm so over it.

It's time we talk about this honestly and openly so we can support each other to move past it. People like to see people tackling this thing called life because we're all going through it.

So, there's this rumor that when you hit a certain age, you enter a certain life stage, you are active in specific groups that you need to wear certain shoes, drive a certain car, do specific things.  If you've ever hesitated to wear an outfit, express what you would really rather be doing or tell someone you're an entrepreneur; you know what I'm talking about.

I see so many brilliant women buying into this rumor and falling into a mold someone created and thought that's exactly how each of us needed to be and once upon a time, I was one of them.  I thought that I needed to look, speak, and act in a way that fit the group of people around me.  I admire them.  I believe them to be a particular way and placed them on this pedestal.  They make it look easy and natural.  All of them.  And they all fit this mold. A mold that I didn't quite fit into.  To make matters worse, we live in this age where we are bombarded 24/7 with how amazingly cool and creative and unstoppable and successful they all are.  All of this pressure and self-shame started to make me feel like an absolute fraud.

How could I say I own a business when it's just a daycare in my house?

How could I tell people I'm a professional photographer when I never went to school for it or have credentials lined up on the walls of my office?

How could I say that I am a good mom when I don't volunteer at the elementary school?

Does this sound familiar to you? Believing there is some mold you step into, and that if you don't fit that mold, you are then doomed - is the best way to lose your mojo.

I don't fit the almost 40 mold.

I don't fit the entrepreneurial mold.

I don't fit the every Sunday church-goer mold.

I don't fit the mom of elementary kids mold.

And I am absolutely ok with that.  I no longer tell myself I am not meant for certain roles because I don't possess all of the skills or traits I'm told are required for one.  Instead, I recognize the skills I do have and leverage them.  

As I grow, my business and my relationships grow.  It's a pretty magical thing to discover what the facets of you are, it's part of the journey.  It's not narcissistic to embrace who you are and who you're becoming.  It's therapeutic actually.  And if you share your story with others, as I am dishing it out here, it can be helpful to them.   I know you have what it takes to have a beautiful life, create the business of your dreams, and make a great living but that's not enough.  You must believe in you too.  Take the gifts you were born with, the skills you've developed, and your vision for the future - all the fabulous things that make your mojo - and build around that!

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