Always, Sarah

A Girl Not So Inspired

As the season of resolutions are upon us, I love seeing everyone so optimistic about their futures.  The gym is full, projects are getting launched, social media games are on point and I've found myself blogging again.  To be completely honest, I'm writing today, not because of a resolution but because timing is simply right for me.  The Hubs is watching football, the littles are all doing their thing, I have a new lap top { thanks Santa } and most of all, I'm not sitting in a hospital room.

If you've been following me for a while, you would know that my son was diagnosed with a rare kidney disease in 2013 and in a year and a half, his kidneys crashed completely.  At 16 years of age, he had endured 10 surgeries, multiple smaller procedures like biopsies, and endless stays in hospitals which a couple lasted for a month.  You can read what he taught me during this time here

I am happy to share that he received a kidney transplant on November 11, 2016 and he is recovering very well.  As a matter of fact, he starts school tomorrow. Yes, let's take a moment to chair dance right now.

In this time, I've found time to write here and there and even got some photo shoots in but when it got down to it, I was a girl not so inspired. My kid was sick and I couldn't do anything about it and my cheerleading powers were used up daily keeping his and the rest of the family's spirits up so, I will apologize that I haven't been around.  I know ya'll understand and would give me hugs, which I would happily sink into, I am just sharing this with you so you know why I've been sporadic with my attendance.  I like to be known as the girl who is always full of sunshine and daisies but for the last few months of 2016, I wasn't quite that.

At home doing an extra dialysis exchange because his regular prescription wasn't working. 

At home doing an extra dialysis exchange because his regular prescription wasn't working. 

If you've been in a circle where someone's health has spiraled down and awaiting transplant, you know it can be such a long, painstaking, emotionally draining and, many times, helpless.  Although I knew my God would pull through and had something amazing in the works, I found myself unable to give my son the kidney that he needed, make his pain go away, give him the energy to walk around the pediatric floor, or make them stop poking him at all hours of the day.  Just helpless.  But, there are these people who swooped in and gave me courage, strength, and showed me that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  These people who stopped what they were doing and hugged me as I cried by myself in front of my son's room.  These people who came to visit him when he wasn't even admitted to their floor. These people who would start their day early to get me a coffee from Starbucks before their shift started.  These people who would watch my son get baptized on their day off, or even after working a 12-hour night shift.  These people who would sacrifice their lunch to make him smile. These people who are overlooked because they are simply doing their job.  Do you know these people? I hope that you wouldn't need to know them.  I hope that you're never in situation where you're in a hospital for a long period of time.  However, if you are ever in that situation, I hope that these people appear before you and become your tribe, as they have become mine.  These people aren't just nurses, but light bearers.  As soon as I would feel darkness creeping in, one of them would come in to light up my world.

At the Boy's baptism a few weeks before he got his transplant.

At the Boy's baptism a few weeks before he got his transplant.

So, yes, for a little while there, I was A Girl Not So Inspired, but with the help of those who placed themselves around me - or were placed before me on purpose - I am back.  They will always be remembered and have a special place in my heart.  As my son is on the road to recovery, I am too and I hope you continue this journey with me.

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